Songs & Stories of My Life with Osho - Article
Songs & Stories Of My Life With Osho
The idea to share Songs & Stories Of My Life With Osho arose because so many people have asked Deva and I about him. We never really have enough time in our groups or concerts for all the questions, which range from 'Did you really sing for him?' to 'What about the Rolls Royce's?' and just about everything else in between.
So, while in Byron Bay, I decided to devote an evening to him and to leave it open to whatever happened...in the true spirit of Osho. It was a very special gathering, with people from all walks of life attending, and so I thought it would be nice to offer the same kind of event at The Rainbow Festival. Not that I have any answers!!
Being with Osho, or any master for that matter, is a lesson in trust - trusting in something that the mind cannot grasp. Let's call it the 'Way of the Heart'. And the deeper you go into the heart, the more obvious it becomes that answers are not only irrelevant and unnecessary, they are actually non existent!
I found the evening in Byron Bay helped me personally, to reach a deeper understanding of my connection with Osho, so I'm looking forward to going deeper into it again, at the Rainbow Festival.
When I look back at my life, I see it has been pretty easy. I didn't go through any big traumatic youthful rebellion or anything... I meandered through life,growing up in a loving family in England to the sound of rock'n roll and eating lots of meat and potatos! (It wasn't until the age of 25 that I became a vegetarian.) After school I played folk songs and Beatle songs with a friend and that nurtured and sustained any religious longing that I may have had.
Music has always been a door to spirituality for me. Around the time I discovered Osho - through reading one of his books on Zen, No Water No Moon - my 'easy' life had been shattered by a frustrating career as a rock musician and a broken marriage. Music felt like a lie - in fact EVERYTHING felt like a lie. I decided to sell all my guitars, and I disappeared from my old life, and dived headlong into the communal life of Osho's sangha.
It was an amazing revelation. I wasn't prepared for the healing power of the music that was happening there. This turned my head to what real sacred music was - even though it was western in style, it still had the most uplifting and spiritual nature, especially the 'Music Groups' and the Sufi dances. I was hooked on Sufi dance and never missed an opportunity to participate. All this music, along with a life of communal integration, deeper relating, and Osho's discourses and meditations, healed me from whatever wounds I'd been carrying around music, and life in general.
I began to join the musicians, and found myself entering a new world of music that was played from the heart, for the heart. In this healing I dropped into a deep state of trust, that nothing has ever been able to shake - not the falling apart of the ranch in Oregon, or the scandals, or the bad press that Osho always received, or any distressing personal issues that I had to face...nothing shook the trust that I had been guided here to my Master's feet and that I was meant to be exactly where I was, doing exactly what I was doing - whatever happened.
And that has never changed - every day continues to be a new miracle. But don't get me wrong: living in Osho's sangha wasn't exactly a bed of roses. I had my share of hard times too. I had to face my 'demons', but in such a spiritual community, I could do it with a feeling of being supported and understood by my fellow sanyasins. Sanyas was - and still is - a real mystery school where everything happened, and everything was possible. It was certainly no life for the faint hearted, but defintely an amazing experiment for the open hearted.
Basically, I watched as Osho created his 'vision' day by day. Sometimes, before discourse he'd want wild music, other days it would be 'Zen-like', the next 'silent'.... it all depended on what subject he chose to speak on. He was working with a very broad canvas - thousands and thousands of people were attracted to him, from all walks of life, and from very diverse cultural traditions and backgrounds. Osho himself was not attached to any lineage, so he had no tradition behind him; in fact, I guess you could say he was anti-tradition, although in reality he wasn't 'anti' anything. He awoke at 21 years of age, and continued to experiment and deepen his experience - beyond enlightenment as he'd say - until his Samadhi, in January 1990. We were just blessed to be around his physical presence for those few precious years.
And of course, some of us participated in the experiment, some left, disappointed and mistrustful. Personally, I felt like I'd stepped into a holy fire, and saw myself being cleansed as a result. For that I will be eternally grateful. And as you know, there are no such things as 'mistakes' on the Path - every step is an enquiry, an experience to learn from, so whatever happens as we go on our way, becomes a blessing. I have found it is important to never label any experience 'good or 'bad', or 'right' or 'wrong'... no matter how bitter the pill may be, to swallow. This helps me to be grateful for every lesson I've been given.
Now Osho's sangha has splintered into many, many fragments. There are sannyasins everywhere, but nobody knows who they are anymore! Not even the sannyasins. This may be a good thing. I'm sometimes sad that we were never able to realise Osho's vision of large global communes in which we and our children lived openly together, but that obviously wasn't meant to be. Instead we all dissolved into the vast global village of like minded souls...no more a segregated community of 'orange people, ' but one big family with no borders, whether you're 'with' Papaji, or Osho, or Ramana, or Maharaji or whoever.... some of us have arrived at an understanding that All is One, each of us bringing our own distinct fragrance of whatever master inspired us. We are beginning to learn from each other - and appreciate each other's unique fragrances! This is healthy, I feel.
So, bring your questions, bring your love for your own Master, bring your laughter, bring your tears... all will be welcome. We can all sing our hearts delight together. And we can have a glimpse into the world of one of the most rebellious and inspirational 'spiritually incorrect mystics' of our time.
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